Women and Their Hair & Feminity






Consider this….think of all the family, friends, co- workers you know and their hair attitude. Do you know of any of them who are 100 % content with their hair? I don’t. Hair is women’s nemesis and it seems that we are never truly happy with our hair! Long locks,short styles, smooth beautiful heads…hair, hair, hair.




My new neighbor Tammy has suggested this topic, coincidentally I have been planning to write about my change in hairstyles in a future post. While I’m growing my hair longer ( for the first time in 43 years), Tammy did just the opposite. She had her hair cut short, a radical change after having long hair. It took her a long time to do this, but now that she has acted with resolve, she’s happy with the cut. Needless to say, hair is on our minds.




Tammy boldly states that, “I would like to see women feel beautiful and empowered no matter what their hair style. I have a feeling many women need a reminder that hair is just that…Hair. It can grow out. There are wigs, hair extensions, etc. Why allow hair to consume so much of our time or let it affect our self esteem and confidence? ” Females cut it, curl it and dye it different colors. It’s a financial burden to upkeep their hair. Not only that, it’s an emotional drain on many.






Watch women on television, flip through ads in magazines or notice women at the mall. Many are defined by their hair.The problem is that society has falsely taught women that their beauty depends upon their locks and the longer it is, the better. Like other females, Tammy also believed that having long hair was more feminine.Why are so many women brainwashed that everything depends on perfect hair? ( This is an unreachable goal…there is no such thing as perfect hair.) They are taught at a young age that beautiful hair qualifies them as feminine and that is simply not true!







Tammy also says with conviction, “I wish for you to express to women that long hair does not define their femininity.”Instead of teaching that perfect hair is what makes us or breaks our  feminity, let’s spread the word that feminity is found in a smile, a little laugh or a monstrous hug filled with love. It shows in a woman’s glow on their face. It lives in grace and confidence. My husband married me, when I had a short hair style. The odd thing is that he told me he prefers long hair but it must have not really mattered, for love is love. Now that I’ve grown my hair out past my shoulders, the love remains the same.



Tammy remarks, “Many struggle with no hair due to cancer.” These points are true and worth pondering over. Strong dignified women sometimes lose their hair from harsh cancer treatments. This is not only a physical battle but emotional. Because of women’s learned values concerning hair, I would surmise that it is a profound struggle to expose their loss. Yet, what I see and many other people see is that these women are stunning…without hair. Their beauty is not defined by hair, but beautifully shaped heads, powerful eyes (the windows to the soul),and  facial features like cheek bones. This deep beauty lives in their everyday strength to fight.





Let’s start a hair revolution of acceptance and love for what we have! When women peek in the mirror, Tammy and I wish for them to love their hair. If one simply can’t accept what it is, then change it! If you crave a change, take the giant leap that Tammy took, what do you have to lose( but a little hair) ? Remember that hair is simply hair…straight, curly, shoulder length or short and sassy. It doesn’t define you or how feminine you are, you do that on your very own!


All My Best,

Heart and Soul ❤️

14 thoughts on “Women and Their Hair & Feminity

  1. Such an interesting topic and so very true. We women do spend way too much time and money tending to our hair. I remarked to my daughter just this weekend how nice it would be to just throw on a cap and head out the door like my husband does, instead of feeling like I must wash, blow dry and hair spray my hair first to make myself “presentable.” I have never been happy with my hair because it has always been high maintenance (thin and flyaway with just enough curl to make it annoying) but my sister-in-law who has the wonderful naturally curly hair I’ve always craved, hates her hair too! What’s a girl to do!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. wise words. when I had lost my hair due to cancer 8 years ago I felt bereft and terrible at first. Then I began to put it under my favourite plants and felt better!


      1. no Mary it has just begun to rain now! So at the City park today around a 100 hibiscus had suddenly come up there, to flirt with the rains! Of course tomorrow they will wilt. so my garden is perking up.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. No it has just begun to rain here today so when I went to the City park today I discovered 50 to a 100 hibiscus there, all colours come to flirt with the rain. there were many marigolds as well. My garden too has perked up though it mostly has green plants. ferns and ivies.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Mary!! My new cherished neighbor!! Wonderful read!! ❤ You have expressed my thoughts completely. I hope women really "hear" your words and use them as "food for thought." 🙂 Thank you very much for taking my idea and putting into the words that I could not.

    Liked by 1 person

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